the comfort zone

Why being comfortable is over-rated

Finding your Comfort Zone We all seek comfort. Why wouldn’t we? Ultimately a place where we feel safe and in control is what we are stacked to aim for. Comfort is a state of physical ease and freedom from pain or constraint so it is natural that as people we […]

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lost sex

Lost Sex ~ a short Sunday reflection

I am writing about libido for another post and have been thinking a lot about desire and how it works. I think in most relationships there will be times when you almost forget how good things can be, time passes, and you slip into a place where you are no […]

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haunted by you

Haunted by You – A Vignette

I am haunted. Haunted by you. My hands brush my face and I smell you. It catches me off guard as I breathe you in and I am thrown back in time, there with you again. My fingers trace the length of your cock, enjoying the silk of your skin […]

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Sex as the sixth sense - picture of the brain

Sex as the Sixth Sense

Back in the 18th century, philosophers debated whether or not sex was a sense. This continued into the Victorian times with good arguments on both sides, but the discourse became sort of settled and the acceptance of only 5 senses was adopted. More recently discussion has started again with proposals […]

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Sex, submission and confidence

I have low confidence. That is not to say I am not confident in some things, knowledge about certain topics and stuff, but in myself, not really, no. I have quite low self esteem too. It is a fragile thing and although my life pretty much validates me, it is […]

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sex and BDSM

Sex and BDSM: Dominance and submission

Many people assume that sex and BDSM are linked in that BDSM (Bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism) is always about sex. I suppose this depends on your definition of ‘sex’. For me, all of these elements would have a sexual charge, I find them sexy too, […]

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sport mat in arm

Being a good sport

I like to think that I am a good sport, but that does not mean that I am good at sport. Oh no. Sport really is not my thing. I am lucky that there is nothing physically wrong with me which prevents me being able to take part so it […]

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Training the mind and the body

My head tends to be a busy place to be. This is normal for me and I have come to accept it, but it is not always conducive to being a good submissive. The Dominance helps of course and it is one of the big attractions for me. Especially in […]

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More about the sex

Since writing All about the sex? where I explained that although sex is part of our dynamic, there are other key parts too that I feel can sometimes be overlooked, a couple of conversations and a couple of comments have made me think a bit more about sex and the role it […]

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All about the sex?

I guess that the truth is: sex sells. And in our society that seems to be the case whether you are selling a car, a bottle of perfume, an ice-cream, or a relationship. If you look around you, it is often difficult to separate the sexy images from the product […]

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Kinkless Sex

Sometimes it seems that there is a lot of focus in D/s relationships on kinky sex. Personally, Sir and I love being kinky and exploring that previously denied part of ourselves. But not all sex has to be kinky, and I think that when you enjoy a frequent and regular […]

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