Why D/s is good for my self care

Why D/s is good for my self care

It might seem that focussing on the needs and desires of your partner would leave you open to being taken advantage of and not able to fully have your own needs met. I think that this can be a common misconception of those who do not have a full understanding […]

Continue reading

I have spread my dreams under your feet

I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams. These lines are taken from one of my favourite poems, The Cloths of Heaven by W B Yeats. I wrote a short piece about the poem before and when I did, described my dreams […]

Continue reading

Writing: The what and the why

I have always enjoyed writing but it isn’t something felt I was good at as a young person. I wrote stories which I made into books as a child, but when my sister started the same thing, it was hers that my parents held in esteem. I suppose after a […]

Continue reading

Lucky is a state of mind

So, this is late and is not the post that I was planning to write at all.  I had planned a combined post about luck and about words to live by but it is not this post. I had sat down at my laptop and written one line of the […]

Continue reading


This is the one place in the world where I am faceless. Everywhere else I have a face and that says different things about me to different people. I don’t think my face is consistently translated either; it depends on the perception and experience of that particular person. One day […]

Continue reading

The Innocent Selfie

HL is a fan of the selfie. In fact, it is one of the ways that he uses to remind me of his ownership of me. Sunday: I will require you to send me a picture of you in your underwear each morning this week. A simple enough instruction on […]

Continue reading

Crazy for You and for Everything

Crazy feels good for me. It holds an attraction that I just can’t shake and this has been with me for a long time. I am very normal. And I know better than to use that word – it alienates and it excludes, but it is anyway. And in many […]

Continue reading
Room 101

Room 101 for Food For Thought Friday #101

The prompt this week for Food For Thought Friday is Room 101. As an Orwell fan,, I thought about using ‘1984’ as my inspiration and writing about my worst fear. I have written about fear before and being honest, the thought of Winston Smith with the rat cage attached to […]

Continue reading


The Food for Thought Friday topic this week is LANDMARKS. What, if any, have been your particular landmarks, either in relation to your blog or your wider life? Do you have any future goals/landmarks you want to achieve? What are they? This is the 100th F4TF prompt and I really […]

Continue reading

The Things We Do or This Thing We Do

According to the urban dictionary, ‘TTWD’ or ‘This Thing We Do’ is “Commonly used in the S&M/spanking community to refer to those activities.” Actually I think a clearer definition would be to say that within the BDSM community, TTWD refers to the activities we practice. For us, that would be essentially living a D/s […]

Continue reading
sugar and spice - spicy sex

Sugar and Spice – spicy sex?

I have always been someone who enjoys sex. When I look back now that sort of surprises me as the type of sex we have currently is so different to anything that I had found before. The closest comparison would be at the beginning of the relationship when you are […]

Continue reading
Mental Health Cartoon

Mental Health: Food For Thought

I am always interested in mental health and emotional well-being and so I wanted to write a post for the Food For Thought Friday prompt this week. I do feel a little fraudulent, however, as I am fortunate that I don’t suffer from depression, so I did hesitate about posting […]

Continue reading

Respect the Rules

Rules are pretty key to our relationship, although even without that I am a person who likes to have rules to follow. I suppose that is why a D/s marriage works so well for me as having rules and structure makes me feel safe. It makes sense of things and […]

Continue reading
being vocal

Being Vocal

I struggle with being vocal during sex and play. It is not something that I have ever done and therefore it feels uncomfortable I suppose. I know that part of what makes things work well is to communicate your thoughts and feelings and I have no trouble with that in […]

Continue reading


I remember when I first started masturbating. I don’t know how old I was, maybe 12, but I recall the way it felt. Even then it wasn’t just the physical; doing it felt really illicit and I loved it. In fact the thought of doing it was so thrilling and […]

Continue reading

Let’s talk about sex, baby

I teach sex education. Actually, I teach sexual health and relationships education and we follow a national programme which meets the relevant outcomes for health and well being in those areas. I have written before about the probable fallout there would be if it was discovered that the teacher was […]

Continue reading

Knock Knock

In a house full of teenagers, being interrupted in full flow is as common as having to change our plans last minute, and having to put off what we want in order to prioritise others. It happens frequently and these days we are resigned to having to work around it. […]

Continue reading
the no so secret submissive

The not so secret submissive

I often look at people who are completely open about leading a D/s dynamic and wish I could be more like that. I believe so strongly in what we are doing and in the fact that it is the right thing for us. I know that it wouldn’t suit everyone […]

Continue reading

Dare to Bare

I have a complicated relationship with nudity and it is one which has changed quite a bit over the past while. I have never liked my body but have always been comfortable enough to show parts of it in the right set of circumstances. That would include being topless when […]

Continue reading