These submissive musings posts consist of random thoughts, ponderings and inspiration on all things which relate to Dominance and submission. This contains reflection on topics to do with my life and experience as well as topics which are current and/or have been highlighted by others.
Writing in this category will often contain responses to some of the memes and prompts that I take part in.
There are lots of misunderstandings about Dominance and submission. One of these is the idea that ownership is a negative thing. For a submissive this is not the case. Ownership and the sense of feeling owned or belonging to someone is a powerful and beautiful thing. It is not about […]
I have been meaning to write a post about topping from the bottom for a while. For quite a long time, in fact. Why? Because it is a term which is bandied around in submissive circles and I often disagree with its use. Technically speaking, topping from the bottom is […]
Finding your Comfort Zone We all seek comfort. Why wouldn’t we? Ultimately a place where we feel safe and in control is what we are stacked to aim for. Comfort is a state of physical ease and freedom from pain or constraint so it is natural that as people we […]
This question is something that seems to cause a lot of deliberation and consideration in D/s circles. I am not sure why. I suppose somewhere there is pressure to be a ‘submissive type’ so that we can see how well we are doing and how well we match up. I […]
There are a lot of misconceptions surrounding kink and BDSM. There are a lot of misconceptions surrounding D/s too and I have written about some of those in 13 Things about a D/s Relationship, and a Bertie. But I think that one of the most misunderstood areas, even within the […]
“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” True but for me, my name has become more than just something to call me. It is tied firmly into my identity, as a blogger and as a submissive. Although I began […]
Every once in a while I read a post on twitter or WordPress decrying sex education in schools. Usually these posts quote a lack of education around pornography and sexual pleasure as well as consent, inclusion and diversity. I wonder about the authors. I wonder when they were last in […]
The topic for Wicked Wednesday this time is fantasies. I wanted to write a hot fantasy but I am just not there yet. I am still feeling serious and analytical, but looking back at the fantasy material I have here on my blog, I see the progress that I have […]
For me submissive headspace is the place I am in when I am deeply submissive. It goes beyond my submissive mindset because mindset is more of a conscious thing. Submissive headspace differs because it is about thinking and feeling deeply submissive which becomes an automatic response. It is a place […]
What does being a submissive mean? First of all, there is a difference between being submissive and being a submissive. One is an adjective which describes something you are and the other is a noun which is the name for something you are. I also believe that being submissive in […]
There are some things I have found interesting about impulsivity and how being a submissive has made a difference to it. Like many of my traits, submission seems to have built on the positives while allowing me to move away from some of my less positive behaviours. There are a […]
Let’s start with some common misconceptions about a D/s relationship 1. D/s is not abuse And those who take part in it are not always victims of abuse looking for a way to manage it. While public opinion would have you believe that D/s relationships are abusive, this is not […]
I used to really enjoy foreplay. And other times I used to find it a chore. Now I don’t think we do it which sounds weird, but bare with me. Foreplay is what you do before sex, right? But what we do is play. Yes, often there is penetration but […]
I have written a lot about trust and the need for trust in a D/s relationship such as the one I have with HL. In order to build this level of trust it is important to be honest and open and this can make us vulnerable. I am generally a […]
Unrequited love is usually concerned with a love which is not reciprocated for whatever reason. It may be that the object of your desire is unaware of your feelings, or indeed unavailable to you. It might happen that your love for them has continued beyond the point where you were […]
I have thought a lot about what it is to be a submissive wife and I suppose it starts with what submission is or, at least what it means. The meaning of submissive is: Ready to conform to the authority or will of others; meekly obedient or passive, Assuming this […]
I would have said that I was into kink but had no fetishes. Having done some research I am now confused. At times I have even wondered if I am still kinky. It is hard because I move in worlds where what we do seems to be the norm. I […]
Back in the 18th century, philosophers debated whether or not sex was a sense. This continued into the Victorian times with good arguments on both sides, but the discourse became sort of settled and the acceptance of only 5 senses was adopted. More recently discussion has started again with proposals […]
I have low confidence. That is not to say I am not confident in some things, knowledge about certain topics and stuff, but in myself, not really, no. I have quite low self esteem too. It is a fragile thing and although my life pretty much validates me, it is […]
The topic for Tell Me About this time is labels. Categorising and labelling in an essential part of our learning and understanding of what is going on around us. It helps us to link things and by understanding similarities and differences within and between these categories, to arrive more quickly […]