Natural submissive

Is it better to be a natural submissive?

To what extent are you a natural submissive? What is a natural submissive? This one is a bit of a can of worms, and I do love opening those online as they so often lead to very good discussion. The idea of the natural submissive as the ultimate parter is […]

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Submissive Self

Break me and make me yours ~ submissive self

How would you describe your submissive self? I belong to HL and am his in so many ways. I have a commitment to him formally as his wife, and privately as his submissive. I have grown with him in so many ways over the past 10 years that we are […]

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Sexy scene

A sexy scene

Actually it was more sexy play than a sexy scene but I felt the alliteration worked better for my title. In addition, the sexy play lasted about an hour and a half which, by my definition puts it more in the scene category. However, usually a scene is something that […]

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Learn from others - best friends

The best ways to learn from others

How do you learn from others? I thought a good place to start writing again would be to pick up where I dropped off with regard to my submissive reflection prompts. Who doesn’t benefit from some submissive reflection? Fortunately I had made a list of them before I started (and […]

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I took a break

I took a break but I am not broken

Well. As you can see. I took another break again. This is the longest break I have had so far. But the fact that the past year has seen a few, probably tells me something. And I will tell you. I have wondered about whether or not continuing to blog […]

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Vanilla Valentine’s Heart

An Unusually Vanilla Valentine’s Day

The thing about vanilla …. I don’t usually do vanilla. I gave it up as my flavour when I embraced the world of D/s and kink and, being honest, I have never really looked back. Not that there is anything wrong with vanilla sex, it can actually be a very […]

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Chess pieces - challenges to submission

The greatest challenges to my submission

What challenges your submission? The next submissive reflection prompt is about challenges to my submission. There is not one clear answer to this one as there are a few different factors playing into it, but I think it is something really worthwhile to consider. One of the main things that […]

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Fun, photos and switching things up

This image was taken a while ago, the first time we went away for a few days with our friends PS and gem. One of the things we had planned to do together was to take some pictures and this was one of the outfits I put on. It is […]

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Submissive mindset

New ways of keeping a submissive mindset

What helps you to keep your submissive mindset? The third prompt for my submissive reflection is about keeping a submissive mindset. I don’t know that others always agree but I have come to see my submissive mindset as different to my submissive headspace. My submissive mindset is about the way […]

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Two Floggers

Two floggers are better than one

We have received a gift of a set of Poi Floggers from our friend, Leatherman. We haven’t had the opportunity to use them but HL tells me that tonight is the night. I am both interested to see how they feel and nervous about the play, as it is a […]

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Submissive growth

Submissive growth and how to make it happen

How do you want your submission to grow over the course of this year? The second question that I am focusing on in terms of my current submissive reflection is How do you want your submission to grow over the course of this year? For me, growth as as submissive […]

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A dance is better than a song

A song is nice but a dance is better

If I had to choose between a song or a dance, I would choose to dance everything time. For one, I do not have a great singing voice. Not that this feels fair. I am musical, play several instruments, have a good sense of rhythm and can hold a tune. […]

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New angle

Looking at things from a new angle

Sometimes it is helpful to look at things from a new angle. It can be really hard to do, especially when you are reflecting or examining things about yourself. Even with others, we seem to become so easily entrenched in what we expect an outcome to be, or the way […]

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submissive feelings

Submissive feelings and how to embrace them

When did you first realise you had submissive feelings and how far have you embraced those feelings? This is the first in the Submissive Reflection Prompts over on Tell Me About. My aim is to really take a long hard look at where I am in terms of my submission […]

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Beyond Black and white

Beyond the Black and the White

I spent a lot of years trying to outrun or outsmart vulnerability by making things certain and definite, black and white, good and bad. My inability to lean into the discomfort of vulnerability limited the fullness of those important experiences that are wrought with uncertainty: Love, belonging, trust, joy, and […]

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The sex life I want is passionate, intimate and intense

The sex life I want This post is about the sex life I want, which is really the one I have. But I want it more: more frequently, more consistently, more reliably. More passionate, more intimate, and more intense.(But first ……a little digression.)I decided this year that I wanted to […]

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humiliation kink

What is a humiliation kink and do I have one?

What is a humiliation kink? Humiliation of the erotic type can be very arousing. People who derive sexual pleasure from being humiliated in certain ways, can come to see themselves as having a humiliation kink. I would certainly put myself into this category, but this is something I have taken […]

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objectification fetish

What is an objectification fetish?

Objectification as a kink or fetish is a type of humiliation play which can form part of BDSM activities. For someone who enjoys this type of kink it can be really powerful, but it is something that is often misunderstood and it is frequently treated with caution due to the […]

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