We have received a gift of a set of Poi Floggers from our friend, Leatherman. We haven’t had the opportunity to use them but HL tells me that tonight is the night. I am both interested to see how they feel and nervous about the play, as it is a while since we have done any real impact. We have had mixed success with flogging but HL has been practising the florentine technique and feels he is ready.
I am wearing boots and knickers which feels like a good combination of something to make me feel dressed up, but not too much to inhibit play or a good set of marks. HL is a sadist and likes to see my skin redden, as well as feeling that I am taking pain for him. Flogging can be used well for sensation but, depending on the technique and the intensity, it can also have a real bite to it. I have no idea how these new floggers will feel and I wonder what the effect of having two used simultaneously will be like.
We used a ladder on a previous occasion for flogging and found that the position worked well, so HL instructs me to stand with my front against the ladder, feet placed either side of the long sides and hands woven through one of the rungs. He doesn’t secure me using cuffs as honour bondage is something that works quite well for us, and the fact that I know I have to remain in position means that I feel his control even without the physical reminder. I am all in the head, after all!
I am focused on the beat of the music when I feel HL behind me. He presses his body into mine and I feel the roughness of his clothing on my naked skin. He talks in a low voice which is husky and sexy in its tone. He checks in with me, reminding me that he wants me to take what I can for him. I can smell the leather of the floggers as he drapes first one, then the other across my shoulders and back. He rests them over each shoulder and then steps back and I hear the click of the camera.
I try to relax into the ladder and think about absorbing the pain, if and when it comes. It is easier when the intensity is slowly built up for me, but with something new, I never really know how hard it is going to be. I focus on what HL said about taking the pain for him and being his good girl and that makes me more determined. I have a slightly complicated relationship with pain, in that I can never quite let go completely, no matter how I try. There is always part of me that remains conscious and aware.
I feel the cold air move around me as HL starts his figure of eight motion. There is a lot more force created with two floggers rather than one, and I think he must be using them quite energetically because my hair is blowing this way and that. When we discussed his need to give pain it came not just from a place of wanting to feel my submission in that way, but also by a physical need in him to exert himself, so he tends to put a lot of energy behind impact play.
I brace myself for how the falls will feel as they catch my skin, preparing myself, pointlessly for the unknown. When he moves in closer and I do feel them and it is more intense than I expect. My body shifts in towards the ladder slightly with the force and I push my bum out a little in response to my shoulders being moved into the frame of the ladder. I can feel his momentum build as he gets into the swing of things, literally.
I know that I need to do the same. With some forms of play, my head is engaged and this pushes me into my submissive space. Impact play is usually different and my submission comes from the need to please HL. It is about being what he wants and meeting his darker desires. This type of submission is not less enjoyable, it is just different for me. It comes from a different place and so, has different outcomes and requires a different sort of headspace.
It is one that I have to be more active with. Where with humiliation play it will be about trying to stop my thoughts, with impact, I am focussing on them and using them to let me slip further and further into a world of sensation that HL is managing. It is about pleasing him and doing well, and being what he wants and needs me to be. This is different than when he is leading me to confront who I am.
As the floggers fall across my skin over and over, it becomes even more intense. I can feel HL really getting into it and he mixes things up by changing technique and cracking the floggers against me much harder. He stops to check in with me and moves my hand so that I can feel how hard he is. ”See what you have done to me?” he says. ”I love hurting you.” This is the encouragement I need, if I need any encouragement that is! It dials up those submissive feelings and I want to be exactly what he wants and needs.
By the time we have finished my back is red hot. HL is pleased and he grabs me, spinning me around and kissing me deeply. I love it when he is like this – he is rougher, more demanding, determined to take what is his. He removes the little clothing I am wearing, pushes me onto the bed, and fucks me hard. I am lost in the feelings of being his – not as an extension of him, as I can sometimes feel, but more as a worthy possession or as the vehicle for his pleasure.
I am pleased to be able to be what he needs, what he wants. The fact that he is able to explore an otherwise hidden part of himself through this sort of play with me, feels special, although it is hard to put into words and truly explain. I don’t really seem to have needs of my own when we play like this. I haven’t come but it doesn’t matter. I feel satisfied, sated, content in my ability to submit and as if I have all that I want right there in that moment.
The poi floggers that Leatherman made us are gorgeous. The leather falls are a lovley dark red colour and they are connected by chains to handy finger loops. HL will write a proper review of them on the SWC and I will add a link when that is published. As I said, the floggers were simply a gift so this is not a sponsored post, but if you are looking for any leather items (including custom orders) then check out Kustom Kink Leather, Leatherman’s Etsy shop. He is based in the US and has also written a helpful post on looking after your leather items which you can find here.