Sometimes it is helpful to look at things from a new angle. It can be really hard to do, especially when you are reflecting or examining things about yourself. Even with others, we seem to become so easily entrenched in what we expect an outcome to be, or the way we expect someone to think or behave. Growth is all about taking a new angle. It is about shifting your viewpoint slightly and adopting a growth mindset. Thinking outside the box.
When you know yourself well, it can be easy to box yourself in. We can rule out possibilities and dismiss options based upon the past. Having someone else to challenge this thinking can be really helpful. Having someone there to ask that question ‘why?’, or perhaps, ‘why not?’ I work with people who are boxed in, mostly by things they see as being out of their control, and so they try to control what is left by creating a wall of certainty around themselves.
Loss of control is probably one of the scariest things we deal with and our natural default is to try to assume control again. Often we can’t do this in response to what has happened, and so we focus on managing the parts we can. We take such tight control of those that it can become limiting, and even damaging. Getting someone out of one of those corners is hard work, and while I throw everything I have into trying, I can’t say that it is always successful.
Usually I have to take the tiny shifts and moves and see them as larger successes – I try to alter my own view and angle to see things in a positive way, so that I can continue to encourage growth and build on what is there. I am thinking a lot about ways that I have boxed myself in as I reflect on my submission, but also on other areas of my own life. Giving up control and moving past what is there is something which excites me and sometimes I crave.
There is a looseness and a freedom, a lack of anything else mattering that really gives me a thrill. It is odd how quickly those feelings of anxiety can be turned into something else. The way the fight or flight response that holds us back in so many situations. but can actually allow us to move into the unknown with a sense of abandon. Pushing past your own barriers is so difficult to do, but it can feel like the ultimate reward.
The same endorphins and chemicals that we can experience as terrible and want to escape from can suddenly change into ones that make us feel somehow powerful and alive. I am continually fascinated by the way we experience things. The fact that the line between feeling so much one way and so much another, is one that simply seeing things from a different angle can allow us to cross.
Remembering to look behind what you see or feel as your default is hard. Motivating yourself to take a new angle is a constant work. Trying to flip things so that you can turn them on their head and experience them in a new way doesn’t come naturally to lots of us, and yet, it can be such a positive and productive thing thing to do. My reflection is forcing me to look in the mirror, but it is also about seeing things from a different view or angle, and embracing challenge and growth.
I posted the image above some years ago. I didn’t like that post so have basically deleted and started again. It felt that, as a piece of writing, it was from a different time and it no longer fitted what I wanted my blog to be. So I have done a re-edit of the image and taken a different angle with the post. In fact, the image wasn’t one I liked. The angle HL used to take the shot wasn’t one that I thought worked well (my bum looks MASSIVE). I have posted the original, taken from beneath me, below. In the edit, I rotated it, changing the angle and the view to something that felt that worked better.
Monochromerotic this time is on the theme of angles so why not add your link too, either by following the theme or not.