Period Sex

The Truth about Period Sex

Period sex is one of things that still isn’t that acceptable to a lot of people. I would say that we are a pretty open couple, and HL would say that he is ok with period sex, but in reality, we rarely do it. I have brought it up for discussion quite a bit as I wonder if he has just said that he is fine with it for my sake, but even when I give him an out, he still says that he has no issue. But we still don’t do it. Therefore, I conclude, that somewhere deep down, it probably is a bit of an issue.

There are practical considerations of course. It can make a mess and, unless you are in the shower at the time, that can mean going to the bathroom after, but I don’t see that as a huge thing. You can use a towel to protect the covers or use something specifically for play which won’t be damaged at all. We have a fab sheet from Sheets of San Francisco but there are lots of other options too. A packet of wipes beside the bed will be able to remove anything that you would rather not have lingering on your skin overnight if you don’t choose to clean up right away.

While blood is a bodily fluid like any other – semen, saliva, vaginal fluid – it seems to have connotations which make it less palatable in a variety of ways. It is that bit less acceptable and that bit more squicky for some and completely unacceptable and a no-go for many. There are those of course who enjoy it despite the general feeling and then others for whom it is actually a desirable thing.

Menophilia is the sexual arousal and attraction to a woman’s menstrual cycle, in other words, her period blood. I would assume that this encompasses the group of people who have been dubbed ‘blood hounds.’ A blood hound is someone who likes to have vaginal intercourse or oral sex with a woman who is menstruating. I am pretty sure that this will never become a mainstream thing, but perhaps if it were talked about more it might normalise it for some.

Although period sex seems to be few and far between for us, it hasn’t always been this way. I got my period during our honeymoon, we went out and bought a brightly coloured pink and red beach towel and nothing really changed. I know it is possible, I just don’t know what the barrier is. Perhaps I need to make it more obvious at the time that I am up for it as I think that HL can assume that I am not feeling in the mood.

I don’t push it because I have experienced relationships before where it was an issue for the other person and so it is ingrained in me to assume that someone will see it as dirty or wrong. In fact, I think this is the assumption of lots of girls growing up and I remember being shocked when I had my first encounter with someone who didn’t see the issue. He began to touch me. “Stop!” I cried out in warning. “You can’t. I have my period!” He told me not to worry, that it shouldn’t stop us, and swiftly pulled out my tampon!

I think that we need to talk more about sex during a period. According to Healthline there are a number of benefits including: relief from cramps, shorter periods, increased sex drive and the fact it might improve menstrual migraines. All that said, it does seem to be something which is off the cards for a lot of people and I think this is probably to do with societal taboos. Hopefully by discussing the topic more and presenting is in a positive way, period sex can become more mainstream.


Sexual Health
Wicked Wednesday
Posted in Projects, Sexual Health.

15 Comments

  1. I think one of the biggest inhibitors for us was that the pain of cramps meant that sex usually wasn’t an option. However we have had success with orgasms to help overcome that kind of pain.

    • It is interesting that people assume it will make it worse when actually it will relieve the pain. Also in the past I think it happened more as it is much safer contraception wise so it might be that people do it but just don’t talk about it. Missy x

  2. I never thought it was a bad thing. I just accepted this as a natural part of sex. Also, I found that giving her stimulation helped relieve cramps, as PurpleSole mentions. Maybe some of the pleasure signals blocked some of the pain signals.

    • I do think that can happen and hopefully in time things will change and it will become more acceptable generally. Missy x

  3. I believe I actually grew up being told you just don’t have period sex. Since I haven’t had a period for almost 30 years now, there was no way for me to experience men who wouldn’t mind having sex when I menstruated, but I too can’t see why this should really be an issue.
    ~ Marie xox

    • That is interesting. I think I was told the same but I am not sure where that came from. I remember reading a book ‘The Red Tent’ which is historical and they had to live separately while they bled although the women had that time together in the tent and so it was important to them. Missy x

  4. It probably depends on the specific person. Someone may like this kind of sex. Someone does not care at all. For some, this is taboo. How many people, so many opinions.

  5. We’ve invested in soft and washable bedside towels for just these occasions. If we are two horny rabbits, there is very little stopping us. Sometimes the cramps are a lot for her, so it turns into more of a tension releasing massage.

    • A tension relieving massage sounds great. I can understand how it could actually help that heavy ache too. Thanks for your comment. Missy x

  6. It definitely helps relieve cramps! (The orgasming, anyway.)

    One thing I did quite often with my ex was to keep a tampon in, so we could do any/all non-penetrative activities and there was no mess.

    You might be right, re: perhaps deep down, it is an issue. But also, men are socialized in their own ways (parents, religion, peer groups) regarding what is acceptable/enjoyable/respectful. Which could play a part in it. I know, for instance, that my husband feels like I’m already dealing with a lot – physically – when I have a period, and he feels like it’s presumptuous/offensive to ask me to “deal with” more by ‘demanding’ sex.

    *shrug*

    • That is a great point about the socialization and HL has often said the same about making assumptions that I am in pain etc and therefore not in the mood. I also keep a tampon in so that we can do other things. Someone said that the cup worked well but I haven’t tried one and sort of feel it isn’t worth it now I am in my 50s. Too late for a new trick lol

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