A Paddle, a Play Bench, and a Fucking Machine – DIY Dreams

HL is nothing if not creative, motivated and good with his hands. He has made all the eponymous heroes from above, and many more DIY projects besides. He has fashioned gladiator armour for Torture Garden so that he looked the part, he has made makeshift lube from Olive Oil in Italy, and he has created a cane from a curtain pole when he didn’t have the real thing near to hand. He sees not only an opportunity, but a resource in the making. It is pretty cool as whatever we are short of, he will find something near to hand that he can fashion to fit, albeit more enthusiastically than successfully at times.

Sometimes I haven’t given him the credit that he deserves for this. I think that perhaps his quick fixes become lost amongst his carefully constructed plans and I see a toy which has been made more for him than for me. This is wrong. Despite the fact that he enjoys being able to make these items, using it on me is always at the forefront of his mind and I should really remember that when being in receipt of his gifts. Looking at it now, I wonder if I have seemed ungrateful. I certainly feel ungrateful on reflection.

I think that sometimes this is down to the loss of sexiness which comes along with seeing things in stages. Like the three jelly dildos he bought, one of which had a cylindrical tube shape drilled from inside it so that it could be erected onto a stick and used to fuck me while he lay and kissed me at the same time. Its friend, who ended up mounted on an old bicycle handle, gave just the right angle for a DP session. I think that perhaps what i saw was the crudely fashioned toys for a crude purpose, rather than the gift of time and thought and effort that I should have seen.

That being said, I have long since celebrated the skills of my DIY DOM and you can read more about his projects in this linked post, and his own, Nailed It, if you want more details. I guess the theme of this post is trust. Trust is a cornerstone of a D/s relationship and it is something I would say that we have a lot on. However, I don’t think that I always trust him to get it right with his homemade toys and I am sure the time it takes me to let the proof of the pudding be in the eating, leaves him feeling a little underwhelmed.

Sometimes this is because I am scared. My fear means that I hold back and don’t let him see what I have, or what he has. Such was a case in point for the entry of The Howler, where I held back, only to really enjoy the sensation and it be one of the best types of impact play for me. Sometimes, I am not scared, but I have already made my mind up. This was true for the Fucking Machine. The fact that I was wrong about this particular creation was illustrated recently in my post, Anal – A slow and careful undoing where my relaxed and wanton state meant that I disproved all of my preconceived ideas about such an item and what it could do for me.

The first paddle that HL made from a piece of half inch ply was a beast, but has long since been replaced by a cane for our wedding anniversary which he had made from wood and sanded carefully so that it not only felt good but looked beautiful too. So much of our kinky kit has been HL-ed that whether you look in the toy cupboard, check under the bed, or rest on the deadlock on the door, it has been made just for us, just by him. So I am grateful despite what my face might say that I have a man who can not only make all these things, but wants to make them too.

His play bench really has been his crowning glory and many a good scene has taken place with that item as centre stage. He has developed it and altered it so that by now, it is pretty much the perfect fit. And maybe DIY is like relationships in that way. What you need and what you want will grow and shape and change over time, your kit becoming fluid and changeable in an organic way, the same way that you change and grow as a couple. I need to change and embrace fully the way that him making things in the garage to pervert me in the bedroom makes me feel. It is hot. He is hot. And I want him to DIY it on.

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