I don’t often write about being punished and part of that is the fact that usually I am very good at sticking to the rules and expectations for behaviour. I am not the sort of submissive who pushes things just to see and am more likely to follow the correct channels of asking to discuss something if it is bothering me. I like positive attention and that could be part of it. Anyway, things had slipped a bit with us in terms of our dynamic. It wasn’t that we weren’t doing it or that we didn’t want to do it, it was more that we weren’t doing it as much. As a result, some of the things that I am supposed to do lost some of their value as they weren’t really being followed up on in the same way that they usually would be.
One of my rules is that I don’t play without permission; this is because my orgasms belong to HL and he chooses how and when I have them. I have been good at sticking to this and tend not to masturbate all that much these days anyway, so it isn’t that difficult. However, littlegem had asked me to review a toy that they had been sent. It was the Satisfyer Luxury High Fashion and if you would like to read it then please find it over on Purple’s Gem. Luxury High Fashion – Guest Review by Submissy. The High Fashion is one of those toys that is meant to use suction to work on your clit so I was really keen to try as clit stim really is the type of stimulation that I enjoy most, and the one that has the biggest impact on me.
When I received the toy I felt quite excited. I ripped open the lovely spotty packaging gem had used and went straight upstairs to try it out. This toy did not disappoint and I reached my first orgasm pretty quickly, sitting with my back against the bedroom door. I tried it out again later, just for good measure, in a more relaxed and slightly less desperate pose, as I wanted to really see what it could do. I was pleased to find it had not just been beginners luck and bingo, there came orgasm number two of the day. I felt a little bad that I had not sought permission but things had been so lax lately that it didn’t worry me too much. I let HL know and he told me in response that I should have asked permission and that in future if I didn’t I would be punished. We talked about it further when he got in and he asked me for a demo of what the toy could do to me.
We continued to used it together and I am not sure why, a couple of days later, I used the toy again without permission. It wasn’t that I forgot. It was a conscious decision. There were reasons of course but they were not good ones. I was busy cleaning the house and had got to the point of dusting the bedside table where the High Fashion sat charging elegantly on top of its velvet storage bag. I was a bit fed up about the state of the house and the number of jobs that needed doing, also I knew I didn’t have long before the kids got up, and in addition I had left my phone downstairs as I only had on leggings and a vest for cleaning. Whatever the reason, I dismissed the thought in my head that told me I should text for permission and wait for an answer.
I knew that I didn’t have long and felt that I couldn’t really wait. I wanted this now, partly as a reward for all my hard work cleaning and a little break, and an opportunity had presented itself. Another thought passed through my head which said that I wouldn’t need to tell HL anyway and so I took off my clothes and got myself comfortable under the covers. A good orgasm was had and I can honestly say in my defence that my fantasy line was all about him. It was his voice, his fingers, his body on mine as I made my way to my climax. Once achieved, I packed my toy away in a matter of fact way, ready to return to cleaning. However, I could feel an embarrassed smile start to turn the corners of my mouth up, which seemed a little odd. Why was I embarrassed?
I think the embarrassment was also guilt. I knew then that I was going to tell him what I had done and it seemed suddenly surprising to me that I had not asked permission beforehand. There was no way I was going to add a lie or an omission to what I had done and I was resigned to the fact that I would be punished as a result. I sent HL a message telling him what I had done. I got a text back – That will require a reminder of my rule missy. And then another one – It will happen tonight. A third text came in – I can assure you that after tonight you will remember to text me before pleasuring yourself. I had to correct that of course as I had not forgotten, I just hadn’t, to which he said – Even worse.
So there it was. It sat with me all day and although I was pleased that he was going to do something about it, I was also a bit tense as happens when I am made to wait to be punished. I wondered a lot about why I did it and what prompted me, but I didn’t get much further. When I confessed to gem too she asked if it was to test him and see what he would do, but I really don’t think that it was. It could have been a combination of things, I suppose, but it certainly was at the fore of my mind, and so was the punishment which was fast approaching. I thought a lot about what it would be but didn’t think it would be anything too serious as we have always had a punishment to fit the crime sort of thing going.
In actual fact, it didn’t happen until much later when we had gone to bed. HL told me that I was going to be punished for masturbating without permission and instructed me to lie on my back. He put a blindfold over my eyes and then secured me by the wrists and ankles to the bed restraints so that I was completely spreadeagled and immobile. He said that he was going to remind me that my orgasms were his and that he would decide when and how I was going to have one. He told me about the importance of honesty and although he was pleased that I had owned up to what I had done, I had just not been bothered to consider his feelings or ask. I did feel bad about it and was willing for him to do whatever he needed to, so that this thing would be righted and over.
Then he told me to open my mouth and I felt the hard plastic of the ball gag as he placed it inside. I gripped on with my teeth and could feel the liquid in my mouth starting to respond to the foreign object placed inside, forcing it open. While there is something that turns me on about the ball gag, it is also something I hate and he knows that. He had a little conversation with himself where he wondered about whether or not I needed the gag or whether I could keep quiet on my own. He made sure I knew that what he was going to do would mean that I would not be able to help making a noise, so he said it was up to me. I could remain silent, or submit to the gag.
I chose to remain silent, but he gave me another two options to change my mind, building up what was about to take place at each turn. He put some lube onto me then and got to work on my punishment. He told me that he would be forcing orgasms from me and that is exactly what he did. These were not regular orgasms though, they were ruined orgasms. A ruined orgasm is part of orgasm control. It is a little like edging but rather than going up to the point where you are about to orgasm and stopping, in a ruined orgasm you are get to the point right where it has just started, and then it is stopped. This can happen in a variety of ways, but what HL did was to hold the wand he was using very closely to my clit so that the stimulation was far too much mid orgasm to take.
I writhed and I thrashed and I tried to escape the intensity of the vibrations boring into me, but I was so securely fastened. Had I been able to scream I might have, but that had also been an outlet removed from me. I really was at his mercy and because there was no escape and the intensity was too great, the orgasm was squashed during its first wave as my mind became focussed on the overwhelming feeling of the wand tormenting me. He did this four times in total and by the end I was exhausted. There was another reminder at the end about why we had done this, and the lesson I had learnt the hard way. And as we fell asleep, spooned as usual, I felt that I had learnt my lesson.
So that was my punishment: 4 ruined orgasms, and he said that I had got off lightly on account of it being late and the kids being in the next room. Actually it was a lesson that carried on giving; the regular use of the Satisfyer toy over a period of three days – I had to do a lot of research to get my review just right – combined with the prolonged use of the wand on a high intensity had left me swollen and sore, so that every time I moved, there was an naughty ache between my legs, reminding me of what had happened. It made me feel aroused which also added to the punishment as I was clearly reliant on the kindness of HL to decide when and where my need would be met.
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