do you think I'm sexy

Do you think I’m sexy

If you want my body and you think I’m sexy
Come on, sugar, tell me so
If you really need me, just reach out and touch me
Come on, honey, tell me so

This week’s prompt for The Erotic Journal Challenge is: What makes you feel sexy? This is an easy one for me. HisLordship makes me feel sexy, being his submissive makes me feel sexy, and I have discovered that when I feel sexy, I become sexy. This was really the essence of an old post, D/s has made me sexy.  That post was published in October 2016 and things have not changed much in terms of the way that this lifestyle makes me feel. I am more comfortable with who I am on this inside and on the outside. I have found acceptance on a level which I didn’t expect to. I have been able to be myself and to be exposed on the deepest of levels, and still be loved and desired.

That has been a powerful thing in allowing me to further develop my sense of self, as well as to be able to accept that person. I no longer have to hide the things I think will lead to rejection and being able to be open on this level has allowed me the freedom to explore who I really am. This may seem contradictory to many of the pieces I have written about the way I see myself. I have been open about my difficulty with my own body image and about my fear of failing and not being accepted. Those things are there, of course, but they no longer have the hold over me that they once did. This relationship is allowing me to heal. It is a process of recovery, but I am growing stronger.

So much of feeling sexy is about feeling good about myself. It is less about the reflection which stares back from the mirror and more about the confidence that HL nurtures and encourages within me. It comes from learning that I can be pushed outside my own comfort zone and remain safe. It comes from the trust and belief that I have in him to have my back. If comes from being able to see myself the way that he sees me. Feeling sexy comes from the way he speaks to me and the things he says. It comes from the way that he looks at me and the way that he touches me. It comes from being able to bare myself to him physically, emotionally and mentally.

If anyone had asked me previously, I would not have believed that I would feel like this at this point in my life. It is interesting that I can feel better about myself now, in my late forties, than I ever have before.  My body is not what it once was of course, but at that time, I did not see the beauty in it. I did not feel sexy or desirable and neither did I appreciate it.  When I am exposed and vulnerable, when I have given up all control, that is when I am free to be sexy. I have nothing to lose, and no sense of ego to hold me back from just experiencing the feelings that come my way. Submission pushes me into a place where I become what HL wants me to be, so it is easy to be a better version of myself.


Click below to find out who else is posting for Sinful Sunday and The Erotic Journal Challenge

Sinful Sunday







Posted in Submissive Journal, Throwing Caution To The Window and tagged , , , , , .


  1. This is a wonderful post and also very powerful and that is sort of contradictory. You submit yet you find power in accepting yourself. I can see how that makes you a very sexual creature. Thank you so much for letting us see you in this way <3 <3 <3

  2. I remember this photo -very sexy shot – and I agree feeling sexy is all about acceptance of yourself – I think that often is stronger as we get older x

    • This is actually a new one although it is very similar now I look at them. The other one was without shoes and in front of a door and this is one we took during our last hotel stay. Maybe I am stuck in a rut! Thanks for the compliment regardless. I like it too and my legs are probably one of the parts of me that I am most happy with. The other post is

      • Ah I just see the great legs – perfectly proportioned – in fact I had that first photo in mind when i did a few of my own “fishy shots” last year 😉 x

    • I agree, May…I think we are better at seeing what we have to offer and the value of who we are better as we mature. I wish I’d seen what I had back then, but I’m realizing that sexy goes way beyond the body.

  3. Oh yes, I do think you are sexy, but totally understand how it is the men in our lives that really makes us feel sexy! I totally get feeling sexier now, at this point of our lives, than back when we were unsure about ourselves…

    Rebel xox

  4. Lovely post, Missy. I agree that we often see ourselves more clearly in relation to another. A trusting open relationship gives us the freedom to explore and accept ourselves in new ways. I don’t think it’s necessary to have a relationship to feel sexy, but for some of us, it can do things that solitude can not.

    • Yes perhaps it is all to do with the way we are stacked. I do know it has made such a. Huge difference to me though so I am enjoying that. This was a great topic so thank you ?

  5. An insightful post, Missy … and a gorgeous photo … kudos to the model and the photographer :>))
    Aging has been the kicker for me … as one who did not suffer all that much from body image issues in my 40’s and 50’s, the past 4 or 5 yrs have been a challenge … Frank is supportive, non tolerant of negative self talk and thinks I am sexier now than ever before :>) … nj … xx

    • It sounds like you should listen to Frank in that case. It has been so helpful for me to listed to HL but taking part in Sinful Sunday has helped me see that it is not only him who sees things that I overlook. It has definitely helped to change my perspective ?

    • Thank you. I had not seen it as powerful before but I suppose feeling sexy does give a feeling or power ?

  6. Great post missy, and lovely to ‘see’ you again! I can relate deeply to healing taking place within D/s and just the precious nature of the nurturing and acceptance that encourages self acceptance, and to see clearly how I am seen, even when it is not how I see myself. X

  7. Every evening Missy comes into the bedroom having bathed, hangs her robe on the back of door, and I am always struck how sexy she looks as if it is the first time I saw her naked.

  8. Obviously an incredible image Missy! Reading this post and seeing the image makes me wonder…is there a difference for male and a female sub when it comes to “feeling sexy”? Somehow I’m pretty sure, each gender would make a big difference if asked to define that, but I’m not sure what I’d say personally. Is it the way I look? Is it the way I see myself? Is it the way my Queen makes me feel when she takes charge? Is it what my Queen thinks when she sees me? Wow…now I’m confused!! ?

    • It is an interesting question and once you have thought I would be happy to chat about it. I think it is probably a combination. ?

    • Thanks Julie and I agree. I was in a relationship where I didn’t feel desired for a long time and it really affected me. Thankful HL found me 🙂

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