I don’t remember how old I was when I had my first orgasm. What I do remember is that I found out it was called an orgasm when I was about 15. Before I realised it had a name, I had masturbated to that point. I had also told my boyfriend that if he ‘kept touching me like that’, I would ‘get to a really good bit’, so although I didn’t have the right words for it, I knew that I wanted to experience it. I actually discovered through a friend that this lovely feeling, previously known as ‘the good bit’, had a name, and that what I was actually experiencing was an orgasm.
A few of the boys in our class had already learnt that they could come and thought they were really clever to ask people, “Can you come?” It was so annoying and if any of the unknowing girls said, “yes!” then they would laugh and mock us. However, one of my friends had siblings who were much older who informed her about the fact that, yes, girls could come too! Armed with that new information she returned to school and corrected the boys. And that was the day that I found out, not only that I could come, but that I had been coming for quite a while.
Despite the fact that I had never had an issue reaching an orgasm, I was not prepared for the way that things would change when we introduced Dominance and submission into our relationship. Suddenly, I was much more easily aroused, and even more horny, than I had been before. I drank the orgasms offered with a thirst that felt unquenchable, always hoping for the next. They were more intense and more thrilling than they had ever been before and quite honestly, I couldn’t get enough.
Something else changed too; I started to have different types of orgasms. I have to say that this was pretty exciting for me as a woman already in my 40s, and I have already written a series of posts called Story of the O, which gives some information about my experience of each of the following types if you wish to read further:
Story of the O – #1 Orgasms
Story of the O – #2 Forced Orgasms
Story of the O – #3 Squirting Orgasms
Story of the O – #4 Anal Orgasms
Story of the O – #5 Spanking (impact) Orgasms
Story of the O – #6 Blended Orgasms
Story of the O – #7 Multiple Orgasms (Ripple Orgasms)
One thing that did happen when I became a submissive was that I gave up control of my orgasms. Last year I took part in Tabitha Rayne’s 30 day orgasm fun, which involved taking on the challenge to orgasm every day of the month, as a way to improve mental wellbeing. What I realised was that I had become a bit psychologically dependent on HL for my orgasms. Part of this felt nice, I had wanted him to own my body after all, but part of it made us feel that we had limited ourselves. What he wanted, was for me to be able to pleasure myself at his command, as well as him deciding when and where this would be.
We made it through the month with our own twists and alterations, and I wrote a 30 word dribble (like a drabble but an orgasmic piece) for each of the orgasms that I had. You can read about how I got in 30 Orgasms and a Dribble; it was actually quite illuminating and allowed us to make some changes as to how we approached things. I am always keen to learn more about my body, how it works and what it is capable of, so it has been interesting to play around with some different types of orgasm fun.
And orgasms should be fun. I have written about the relationship between Laughter and Orgasms and I honestly believe that orgasms are good for you. Orgasms can leave you feeling happier, more content and more relaxed, and in the Victorian times, were even used on a medical level as a cure for hysteria. Personally, an orgasm can not only wake me up and make me feel free and alive, but can also help me get to sleep if I am worried or stressed, as it has a way of just clearing out my head and letting me unwind so that I am more able to drift off.
Masturbating myself to orgasm is not something I do a lot, as it doesn’t play such a big part in our relationship. However, I do think it is important to feel connected to your own body, and so it has been a bit of a quest to rebuild that side, where it had previously seemed less important. The orgasms that I give myself remain heavily fuelled by fantasy, whereas those taken by HL will feel much more in the moment and be more about us than they are about the physical gratification. The ones I give myself are nice but they don’t compare to the emotional connection that I get with him from the ones that he makes me have.
The first scene we ever had was a Forced Orgasm Scene and I was surprised at how far HL could push my body, and my mind. Although I like pain, and have orgasmed from impact alone, I am really a girl who is greedy for pleasure, and I will reach subspace more easily from this sort of scene than from any other. It is one of those moments where I feel that I cannot possibly give any more than I already have, and then he makes it clear he will have one more and off I go again. For me, this is real loss of control at its finest.
Probably my favourite type of orgasm ever, is the multiple or ripple orgasm. I have used both names here as, when it happens, I become so lost that I have no idea if I am experiencing lots of orgasms one after another, or one big long one that never seems to end. I have heard people use the term ‘rolling orgasm’ to describe it as well, as it seems just to go on and on. The trick is to get to the point where you are hanging on the precipice of pleasure and keep the pressure so that it never stops, but neither does it ever push you over completely.
I suppose to finish up, I would have to mention simultaneous orgasms. These are a bit like the holy grail for me. They aren’t something that we aim for very much as our play tends to leave us each more focussed on the pleasure of the other, but there is always something so special about coming together. What I love the most is when it happens for me as a direct result of him being about to come. The feeling overwhelms me as I feel him letting go, and I come too, lost in my desire and need for him.