Erotic Photography

A shot of the erotic

There is much focus on photography of the erotic kind this month for one reason or another. I see lovely pictures all over my timeline on twitter and on my blog feed. I am sorry not to be joining in as I have enjoyed the photography that we have done. I am currently at a hiatus with it, and that disappoints me a little as, for a while it, was something that I enjoyed. That is not to say that we will not take any more erotic photos, and indeed I have wondered if I pull back on my interpretation of erotic, if that will allow me to participate, but that is me trying to bend the rules to suit myself, and it is not really something that should be done.

I have always loved erotic photography, however, what one person considers erotic may not be viewed in the same way by others, and this is where I have come unstuck. The age-old debate of art versus porn is one which lives on, and affects not just photography, but other media such as writing as well. It is the fear of how some of my ‘art’ would be viewed which is the key reason that I have had to rethink the content I am sharing. It is not the fear of being judged myself, I am happy to take on the argument on  a personal level, but professionally it would mean our livelihood was at stake so it is not a risk that is sensible to take any longer.

While some of the pictures we have taken could be considered as erotic, others would probably fall into the nude photography and the pornographic categories, certainly if viewed out of context, which they might be. Because it is a personal thing, of course, we would defend our view, but the images speak for themselves and so would the interpretation of those who happened upon them. I suppose if it was not subjective, and there were clear guidelines, it would make things easier, but probably even to pose for something erotic would be deemed inappropriate and unacceptable.  To be cropped away until the merest trace of our story remains, ends up feeling pointless and a weak substitute for where we want to be.

What is a pity is that what can’t be seen in the images is the positive impact that it has had on me. It is something that we have not only come to enjoy with each other, but also something which has been personally healing for me. As I said earlier, I have always enjoyed looking at erotic images and used to wish I was able to be someone who could be photographed in that way. For a short time, I felt that I was doing just that, and the positive feedback that I got inspired me to go further and further with it. I will admit that not all the images were great and not all were erotic, but I felt good about them all and that was a significant step for me.

The creative process has also been something that I have enjoyed and learnt a lot from. Editing is not something I had ever done before, but it did show me how I could turn something which I didn’t much care for in its raw form, into something which I liked the look of.  Changing light and colour, cropping and adding a filter to a picture has let me become someone who’s image I am happier to see, and that has been a huge thing. Taking pictures outdoors has also allowed me to push boundaries and has made me more comfortable with my own body in a lot of ways.

I feel more than a little sad to think of the images sitting in the folder, never to see the light of day, but perhaps that is how it has to be for now. Hopefully we will continue to take pictures of, and for, each other and will find some way of celebrating what that means to us, even if it is not in a public way. I know that HL is really missing it as it fulfilled part of his exhibitionist side. I did point out that I wasn’t sure if it counted if I was the one being exhibited, but none-the-less, it met a need which will no doubt find an out through another means. So while this may not be the forum, having had a short shot of the erotic, it is something we would like to continue in some form.

Wicked Wednesday... a place to be wickedly sexy or sexily wicked

Prompt #350: Erotic Photo

Related post: Shifitng Limits

Posted in Submissive Journal and tagged , , , .


  1. I am a fan of your photos, like many others. In fact, perhaps unlike some, I can remember the first image i ever saw of u – in the snow, posting a letter 😉 – but don’t worry I am not a pervy stalker lol – not yet anyway 😉 x

    • It makes me sad in a way as I really enjoyed it but these things happen. I came here to write so that is what I will do. And I am still perving on yours lol xx

  2. Erotica can involve nudity and sexual acts. I know you had an unfortunate breach of security a while ago and are re-setting things to maintain that plausible deniability. So I understand your lack of photographic posts. But whether you share them with anyone or not, your erotica can include nudity and sexual acts!

  3. I’ve discovered that quite a few of my images are suitable in other situations as art and I’m more and more comfortable about what I take and post. Keeping anon is still important for me but I’m more confident in my skill and the ability to argue for my art as my photography skills have increased.
    I’ve loved your photos and always admired the creativity. I hope you can continue in someway that is satisfying to you both x

  4. I totally understand where you are coming from as our vanilla lives and livelihoods would end as well with any misunderstood photos. Hence we have a nice collection of pics that we only have for each other. The public world will never see these.

    While that may seem sad, it’s not that big of a deal. What is saddest is what you said…the positive impact the pictures have had on you can’t be seen. It just reveals the truth of our world. Things are seen and interpreted one directional only. It’s judgemental.

    I wish you could, and hope someday you can, post anything you want and to show the good that came from it.

  5. I know that the photography projects had a positive impact on you but that it’s always worried you that you may be “outed” in some way and that would affect your professional life.

    I know you make considered decisions and you will find a way to incorporate photography into your life in a way that makes you comfortable. A folder of images that you and HL can look at together is never a waste and you can add to it for your own pleasure x

  6. I am sorry to hear that you have to take a step back and the reasons for it. If only people were more open-minded, but I can understand your fear of them not being and for you to be hurt professionally. I hope you find a way some day to still be able to share some photos, that will preserve your anonymity.

    Rebel xox

  7. It’s a shame that you can’t share your photos like you used to, I can understand your reasoning and disappointment. I do hope you continue to take photos regardless for yours and HL’s pleasure, after all these photos are only really taken for yourselves.

    Maybe one day you can barrage us with all the hidden photos ☺

  8. I wish I was participating in it all too! But I’m just barely getting my blog up and running, and it would be too much on my plate to add that also. For some reason if I add my own photos to a post they never stay sized correctly. Oh well, they be more opportunities. Add the will for your photos. Keep them in the files, and if/when it’s appropriate they’ll come out to play.

  9. I get the need for anonymity. My tats are pretty much dead giveaways, even though I don’t show my face. I would likely lose my job if I were outed publicly with my blog, but I can’t imagine someone finding me (at least in my circle of family and friends) I suppose it is possible, and I am taking a risk by posting the photos I do. I’ll miss yours, but I totally understand your decision.

    • Thanks Brigit. I know what you mean about the chances of anyone finding out. For me there is an added risk from family which is why I have done what I have. Hopefully when circumstances are different I can get back to it ❤️

  10. I really enjoyed this article. And, I find that having a positive body image is a good thing, unfortunately I am not someone who has that. There is a long, long, story behind that. I am one of the most critical people of myself. I realize that women come in all shapes and sizes, unfortunately for me, the companies who make lovely lingerie and such do not accommodate women of my size. Society, as a whole, looks down on us. Add in scars I have and that just worsens the issue. Sir T has taken some photos of me, but after a day or two we delete them. I wish that I felt more confident about myself, but I don’t…. Some things have always been a point of ridicule from almost everyone except Sir T, and sadly that includes the family I grew up in….yeah…you don’t really want someone to joke about your bra size and things in front of friends they have over, or to make comments on the fact that your backside can’t fill out a pair of pants :/ And the fact that it was a “parent” figure that did so much of the “joking” just made it more hurtful. Having someone tell you, “Well your face is cute and you’re petite, and that’s nice. If you had a larger chest size or maybe a slightly larger butt I’d ask you out.” Also isn’t nice! I could go on, but I won’t. However, your post has given me something to ponder…

    • I struggle with it myself but I have tried hard to see myself though HL’s eyes . He has also given me rules about accepting compliments and not putting myself down so that has helped. Being part of Sinful Sunday meant that I was getting the same sorts of comments from others that I was from him and that added weight to what he said and meant that I had to challenge my own negative thinking further. I hope that things improve for you too 🙂

    • I’m sorry to read this, as I know what a struggle self acceptance is. The US based company Hips & Curves has a range of gorgeous lingerie for plus sized women. I’ve bought quite a few items from them, and I like them because they are made specificially, feature gorgeous plus sized models and are ethical in their dealings with customers. It’s a thought, self acceptance comes in increments (and in my experience is always a bit vulnerable to backsliding). I struggle with the conjunction of size and aging, but I figure I’m helping to model more positive attitudes, so it’s not just about how it makes me feel… An important step is opening up about it as you have done here… Regards, Indie

      • I think that sex positivity is so important. My issues are really ingrained so it is hard for me to shift my ideas but it has been inspirational to see what others have been able to achieve and I am encouraged by that.

  11. I am sad you have had to dial back the images both because it was positive for you but also because I will miss seeing them
    It is a shame we live in a world where something so positive can be twisted to be seen as something so negative.


    • Thank you Molly. I agree with you and hope that I will be able to rejoin you again at some point in the future ❤️

  12. You know I absolutely understand your reasoning and decision, and it concerns me too for the same reasons. Where the line lies between art and perceived disrepute is faint. I hope you don’t see all your beautiful images as a waste and hope that you can find a way to express both your needs in a photographic sense again, when and if it’s right for you both x

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